HOPE

Last weekend was spent working and relaxing at home.

Nothing much.

Been having emotional breakdown lately.
I cried even for a slightest, silliest things.

Love is an emotional workout. Well, too much workout I’d say.

Two of my close friends are getting engaged after raya…

My brother is getting engaged this Merdeka Day.



Can somebody hug me please..?

HIGH AND LOW

Yesterday, one of my colleagues, I shall call him JS..he is a senior lecturer and he has been in this university since I was doing my degree. Nway, he is one the 7 lecturers that are teaching the same subject as myself. He was a bit confused yesterday and he felt that he was left in the dark, as everybody else knows what's going on. I felt bad as he is a senior and normally they are a bit sensitive..heheh..so, I emailed him, apologized and explained to him that we did send the info to everybody. Maybe he overlooked the email or something. After sending the email, I went to his room, and explained again. He looked into his email archieve, and walla, the info was there. He just did not read it thoroughly. Haiya..

It felt good though to show people that we do care and don't want any hard feelings whatsoever right. And then, he sent this email to everybody in the group, and I laughed like crazy:

"It's OK ! *Adah ( of course he puts my real name la ), the personality that is always smiling and bubbling with joy , has clarified and made it clear now."

Hahaha..bubbling with joy? I guess that’s me. I felt something good inside..something that I haven't felt in a long while.

Well, that was the high note of the day.

The low note..

My final year student came by to discuss with me about his project proposal...then he said something that was quite disturbing.

“I dah siap semua..Cuma part yg ni AKU tak dapat buat..”

AKU?? AKU?? Hello!!! You are speaking to your supervisor ok. Where are your manners DUDE?? I know la..we are like only 5 years apart..err..maybe more..but please la. Attitude man..attitude..

He did say the word AKU to me again and I said slowly to him:

“Jangan la cakap AKU…”

He smiled..feeling embarrased I supposed and said..SAYA..

Hmm..what happened to teenagers nowadays huh?

Cyberdad’s children called the Ice-Cream seller “Encik” ( Mr. ). We still have hope. (^_^)

SAD

I am feeling a bit down today. It is even raining here this morning.

I am sad because of the death of the actor Hani Mohsin at the age od 41 years old. I don't think my sister knows him..but nway..I have always liked his acting and the way he carried himself in this industry. There were no bad gossips about him and he seems like a caring father to his only child.

Reading about the way he passed away was even more heart-wrenching. He was boarding at Terminal LCCT to go for a holiday with his daughter to Langkawi..when he collapsed in front of her. The panicked Hani Karmila called her mother ( ex-wife to Hani Mohsin ), Tiara Jacquelina, and she rushed to the airport. But then, everything was too late.

Maybe it is right to say that only the good die young.

May you rest in peace Hani Mohsin, and may Allah bless you.

FEAR

I am sorry if I impose pressure on you.

I am sorry if it seems that I don’t trust you.

I am sorry that I wasn’t supportive enough for you.

I am sorry for making everything evolves around me.

I am sorry for being selfish.

I am sorry..

I am just scared..

Are you as scared as I am?

CONGRATULATIONS!

Alhamdulillah, my sister in Dublin has got a job that will bring extra income for her family. I am happy that I don't have to hear her whinings anymore..hahaha..just kidding sis..I am happy for you. So, what present you gonna bring for me? hehehe..

Nway, I totally forgot that they are coming back again this August. Yeah sis, I forgot..heheh..in less than a month, I will be seeing Aeda and Inaas again. I can't wait to pinch that chubby cheek of Aeda and cuddling Inaas like crazy. Heheh..

************************************************

I miss my friends..I miss the good old days. I miss my A-level moments, I miss my uni years..I want to be carefree again..

I FEEL GOOD (^_^)

This is a feel good post.

Every morning, I will go to this one particular café near my department, and ordered my teh ais. The seller is this Indonesian lady. Very motherly..I like her because she always smiles when she sees me and knows exactly what I want. Heheh..

Nway, this morning, while paying for my teh ais, she asked me “Are you married?” and I just smiled and said “No..not yet”. She smiled back and said “Whoever gets you is lucky, you are very beautiful” and I automatically said “ What?!” and we laughed like crazy.

Hahahah..I’m still smiling thinking about it. I know..I know..she wants me to keep coming back for her teh ais..heheh..but let me savour the moment, please.

I like that lady even more now.

WOMEN AND THEIR WORRIES

During her early 20s, being single, she will worry on when will she find a boyfriend..Where is he? How will she meet him? How can she learn to answer the questions from her relatives and friends on settling down and so on? On her late 20s, she started to give up, she started to think, argh..I won’t worry my life away but who is she kidding huh?

Next phase, she finally found someone. Someone that she believes is the one for her. She is happy..they go out, have fun..but after a while, she waited and waited..and her worries re-appear. This time they are different. When will she meet his parents? Doesn’t he want to meet hers? Is she not the one for him? Is he still trying to test the field? When will he popped out the question? And those questions haunt her until she finally just can’t breath.

Oh..how happy that she is now married to the guy she loves. Finally huh? No more worries. Honeymooning, being together all the time. Isn’t life great? Yeah rite! Child? When will she be able to have a baby? They have been trying for a while but why still no baby and of course fingers will be pointing to the wife first. There must be something wrong with her. She may have some sort of illness or something. Will her husband starts to think of marrying someone else on the basis that she can’t conceive?

When they eventually manage to have a child, her worries will start as soon as the child arrives. Will she be a good mother to this precious baby? Will the baby turn out to be the best person that he/she could possibly be? Will her husband starts to think of marrying someone else now on the basis that she can’t provide enough time for him anymore?

Gosh, women and her worries huh? Unreasonable?

Of course, a woman in love can't be reasonable--or she probably wouldn't be in love.

Get it?

FEELING BLUE

Today is the last day I'll be seeing him. Tomorrow, he will go home and I don't know when will I see him again. He is facing so many problems, starting with his handphone, his car, his job and soul searcing..*sigh*

His handphone has this problem of always having a flat battery whenever a call comes in, or sometimes he can't even charged it. So, at times I could not even reach him and it drives me crazy, with anger...dissappointment. I mean, it's one thing if he can't wish me good night or good morning because he is too busy with work or he has no credit left. But it's another different story if I COULD NOT EVEN REACH HIM to do the same thing.

That's what happened this morning. His hp had gone flat, so my sms was not delivered to him. But he is at home, he can always call my office right? Finally, I ended up calling his house and just asked him, what happened? what's wrong with your hp?

Honestly, I am upset that this is our last day, and he had started it in a low note.

I am just feeling so sad right now.

I have a class at 12. Need to pull myself together.

THE MUMMY RETURNS (^_^)

Alhamdulillah, after 3 days of delay, my mom finally arrived in KL last nite. She took a flight from Casablanca-Doha-Singapore and from Singapore, they provided a bus to KL. She reached KL around 10.30pm.

Hmm..what a relief. I thought she would stuck there forever. Can't imagine my Parliament without its PM. Yes, no more waking up early to prepare coffee for Papa, no more waking up early to prepare food for my hungry cats..hahaha..! I'm free at last. But, you know, it was not that bad actually. Not bad at all. Except the part where I had to iron Papa's shirt and pants for the whole week. (^_^)

***********************************************

Writer's Block. Yup, that's what I am having. I have so many things that I wanna share but I can't organize my thoughts.

Oh yes, he is here for the whole week and I have been seeing him since Monday. Hahaha..!

I will see him for either a drink in the evening or dinner. We watched the movie, Superman Returns last Tuesday. Hmm..I was soooooooo..sleepy watching it. The film was so dragging that I just wish he ended up dead. Hahahah..! Nway, I realized that I am old..that I am no longer amazed at seeing him saving lives, lifting planes, flying like a speeding bullet just the way I used too. I used to rewind the scenes when he saves the day. He was so heroic back then. Well, I read that there will be a sequel. Hopefully, more action, more dialoque from the main character himself, and not just "Err..Lois" "Hi" "Is everybody alright?" Heheh..

********************************************

I am watching The Wimbledon Championship. Anybody? Heheh.. I hope Amelie Mauresmo wins the title and of course I want Roger Federer to win again. He is such a good player.


Err..I guess the blockage has been removed..hehehe..

********************************************

I am working tomorrow..!

MY WEEKEND

I had a very relaxing weekend. I did not feel like going out, I just watched DVDs and cooked for my dad and my brother. I wanted to cook my brother’s favorite dish which is Gulai Ayam ( a chicken dish ). Since my mom is not around, I think I should try to cook that dish for him. Awww..what a good sister huh? Heheh..
Nway, I called my cousin and she gave the ingredients and the methods. So, that Saturday, I cooked my first Gulai Ayam..hahaha..! I am actually scared to cook any dish that uses coconut milk as I might spoil it you know. But hey, everything has its first time and there it was, my first Gulai Ayam.

RESULT
I left it on the fire for too long so, there was not much gravy left. Why? Because I was watching the movie 16 Blocks on DVD..heheh..so, my brother was complaining of the lack of gravy BUT he then said, the chicken tasted nice, just the way my mom always cooks it. (^_^) Yes! I take that as a compliment.

*******************************************

My mom was supposed to arrive yesterday. But there was something wrong with her flight. It was delayed until further notice. She sms-ed me the news from Casablanca on Sunday and said that she didn’t know when will her flight to Malaysia will be. I sms-ed her again yesterday morning, without a reply. Last nite, I sms-ed her and finally she replied saying that her flight will be on Wednesday and that she is doing fine. What a relief.

Hmm..talking about Casablanca, whenever I told people that my mom is stuck in Casablanca, they will go like waa..really? Hahaha..! I mean what’s up with that? Then I realized that this is because of the old romantic movie Casablanca that is so popular, hehehe.. but do you know that the movie was entirely made in US? None of it was shoot in Morocco. ( Hihihi..I just found out that Casablanca is in Morocco )

******************************************

Yesterday was also the first day of the new semester. My class is at 8 in the morning and as I predicted, the attendance was lousy. I told my students that if you can’t commit to my 8 o’clock class, please change your section, as this subject is very important for your next semester onwards. ( and less papers for me to mark also..hehehe )
The students? Not bad. Looks like a good bunch. Hopefully la..